I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
