About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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