My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
