omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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