we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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