You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
