Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Randomize
