People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
