Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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