That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Randomize
