I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
