You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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