SEEEEXXX PLEASE
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Randomize
