So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
