i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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