So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Randomize
