I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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