I need help removing her.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
