Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(312): View more from Illinois

i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'

(312): View more from Illinois

i was like PREG?

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(502): View more from Kentucky

people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.

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(251): View more from Alabama

My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth

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(516): View more from New York

He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue

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(647): View more from Ontario

I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.

(1-405): View more from Oklahoma

I'm down.

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