physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
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