Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Randomize
