So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize
