My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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