I only kidnapped one of them. chill
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I AM VODKA MAN
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
