yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize