you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
