Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
