it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Randomize
