just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
