and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
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