haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
