I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Randomize