Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
