Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
