some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
