I think i sorta joined a cult last night
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
