Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
