My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
