forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
