My friends, they love my intelligence
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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