Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
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