Can i not drive my cunt home
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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