shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
