Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
