My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
