big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
