I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
