Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
