i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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