K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
