u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Randomize
