If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
