The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize