Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
